dimanche 27 avril 2008

Wii Fit



Editeur: Nintendo
Développeur: Nintendo
Plateformes: Wii.
Date de sortie: 25/04/2008.
Genre: Fitness à domicile.
Site Officiel.
Version testée: Version complète.


Le pitch: Bien au chaud dans votre salon... faites du sport!

Le contexte: j'ai toujours adoré le sport! Aaaah, ce fabuleux Belgique-URSS de 86, les duels homériques entre Senna et Prost, et plus récemment... STANDARD CHAMPIONNNN!

Petit cours de rattrapage express à l'attention de nos amis de France et d'ailleurs: le Standard est mon club, qui, depuis maintenant 25 ans, survole et domine le football belge, et fait régulièrement d'excellentes performances contre des ténors espagnols et anglais notamment. Incompréhensiblement, malgré cela, aucun titre n'était venu confirmer cette domination, hormis une Coupe de Belgique en 1993, où l'arbitre de la finale avait été tellement impartial et irréprochable qu'il fut nommé directeur général du club peu de temps après (je n'invente rien).

Mais voilà! C'est fait, depuis dimanche passé, on est champions, notre binamé ministre du budget peut jubiler avec sa retenue caractéristique (*), nos premier et vice-premier ministres skettent des pintes avec une crasse frite, la région entière se sent pousser des ailes et il ne m'étonnerait qu'à moitié qu'une étude vienne sous peu affirmer qu'être supporter des Rouches guérit le cancer.

Donc, oui, j'adore le sport!

A une seule petite exception près...

Quand il s'agit d'en faire moi-même.

Doté d'une silhouette tirant dangereusement vers le Guy Carlier de base, j'ai tout naturellement une aversion profonde pour tout effort physique supérieur à celui nécessaire pour me rendre de mon lieu de travail au Quick le plus proche. Effort violent, certes, mais qui en vaut largement la chandelle, même si, en Belgique, pour une raison qui dépasse l'entendement, le Quick'n'Toast a été retiré de la carte. Et rien que pour ça, le rattachement hypothétique de la région Wallonie-Bruxelles à la France me semble une brillante idée. (**)

Mais je m'égare.

Wii Fit, car c'est tout de même là que je veux en arriver, est un jeu vendu avec une espèce de balance pèse-personne (hot asian chick not included) qui, comme la Wiimote, sert de controller alternatif. En grimpant dessus et en bougeant son corps, le jeu analyse les transferts de masse et réagit en conséquence.

Wii Fit est donc un mix équitable entre ma passion première, l'incinération d'animaux domestiques vivants les jeux vidéo, et ma phobie ancestrale, la pratique du sport.

Et pourtant, certains avis autorisés semblent concorder: faire du sport serait bénéfique. Ce ne sont pas les ayants droit de Michel Berger ou Ayrton Senna qui vont me contredire. Donc, pourquoi ne pas essayer? Ce gadget en plastique coûte quand même 90 euros, mais comme j'ai appris cette semaine que ces chacals d'EA me feraient économiser 240 euros...

0:02 Première constatation en déballant la bête: c'est du costaud! La Wii Balance Board doit peser 3 kgs au moins, et elle donne une très rassurante sensation de solidité et stabilité quand on monte dessus. Sur la boîte, un sticker nous informe que la balance peut supporter jusqu'à 150 kgs. Cool, si tout ce sport me fait prendre 50 kgs de muscles, ça sera encore bon!

0:04 Quelques petits soucis pour synchroniser la balance avec la Wii...

0:08 Au cinquième essai, ça marche enfin! Bizarre...

0:10 Directement, la douloureuse: je dois me peser. Argh: 100.2 kgs, belle bête. Mon indice de masse corporelle atteint 33.51 (masse / (taille en m) ²). Pas bon...

0:11 "Nounet, vous êtes un peu obèse. Je vous conseille de faire attention à ce que vous mangez..." Je me doutais un peu que mon régime alimentaire basé sur un subtil équilibre entre fritures, pâtes en sauce et crème pâtissière comportait une faille. Je fais aussi un petit test d'équilibre, où je dois déplacer mon centre de gravité selon les instructions à l'écran. La balance est VRAIMENT très précise! Et comme avec Kawashima, Wii Fit me donne un âge: 46 ans. A peine 9 ans à rattraper, facile!

0:12 Le logiciel propose de se fixer un objectif à atteindre. Je choisis, c'est mon côté résolument optimiste, de perdre 9 kilos en 3 mois. Et pourquoi pas?

0:13 On me demande pudiquement si je veux cacher mes données à l'aide d'un mot de passe. Non, je pense que ma femme est au courant de mon léger embonpoint...

0:15 Quatre types d'exercices sont au programme: yoga, gym, aérobic et équilibre. J'ai aussi le choix entre un entraîneur de chaque sexe , et je reçois une tirelire FitCash, qui va enregistrer le nombre de minutes passées à me torturer le corps sur WiiFit.

0:17 Bon, je suis enfin prêt. Commençons par un peu de yoga, mais sans conviction: il y a une vingtaine d'exercices, dont moins de la moitié sont débloqués. Je choisis le premier, respiration abdominale. Ca ne devrait pas me mettre sur les genoux!

0:18 En effet! En gros, je dois respirer correctement par le nez tout en conservant mon centre de gravité à l'intérieur d'une zone précise. Je reçois 82 points sur 100, et il y a un petit classement par exercice. Pas mal, ça peut motiver (même si je me vois mal refaire cet exercice...).

0:20 Faisons un peu de gym, y a bien 20 ans que ça ne m'était plus arrivé. Etirements. En gros, il faut tenir sur une jambe, et étirer la jambe et le bras opposés, toujours en gardant son équilibre. "Votre jambe tremble légèrement". Tu m'étonnes, ma poule, j'ai quand même un bon quintal à gérer sur une patte. Heureusement que personne n'a pensé à intégrer une webcam au package, j'aurais déjà ma gueule sur Youtube.

0:24 Aérobic: Hula Hoop. Il faut faire des mouvements circulaires du bassin pendant 90", et de temps en temps, il y a un cerceau supplémentaire qui nous est lancé. On doit le rattraper en se penchant et en levant les bras (mais j'y arrive pas, je me ramasse tous les Hula Hoop sur la tronche). Bien crevant! Je fais 14 tours la première fois, puis 92 la deuxième. Y a de la marge!

0:28 Dernière catégorie: équilibre. Y a le ski et le saut à skis qui me font les doux yeux, mais je résiste et je commence par le foot et ses reprises de la tête. Tous les Mii de mes amis m'envoient des ballons, et je dois me pencher pour les toucher. C'est tout, à part qu'ils envoient aussi des chaussures et des têtes de panda, qu'il faut éviter. Mouais, j'attendais mieux.

0:31 Jusqu'ici, vous l'aurez remarqué, rien de bien fabuleux. Essayons le ski. Il y a des portes dans lesquelles il faut slalomer en mettant son poids à gauche ou à droite; en se penchant en avant, on schusse; en arrière, on ralentit. Simple.

0:33 Le feeling est extraordinaire! On sent que son corps entier contrôle le skieur, l'immersion est totale! Je descends en 46:08, mais quatre portes ratées ajoutent 4x7 secondes: 1.14:08 pour ce premier essai. Faut que je batte ça!

0:35 Dans ma tirelire FitCash, il y a 10 minutes de temps d'exercice effectué. Cela débloque un exercice supplémentaire.

0:40 Au bout de cinq tentatives, je réussis un sans-faute en 38:70. Le mode avancé est débloqué, j'ai donc une autre descente, plus longue et plus tortueuse, à ma disposition. Cool!

0:44 J'ai bien envie de continuer à péter les records sur cette nouvelle piste, mais je dois (à regret) essayer d'autres exercices.

0:46 Toujours dans les jeux d'équilibre, il y a un jeu de plateformes, où il faut faire tomber des billes dans des trous en inclinant la surface avec son corps. Sympa mais simplet.

0:50 Là, fini de rire. Avec la Balance, on peut aussi poser d'autres parties du corps, comme par exemple... ses mains pour faire des pompes. Equilibre latéral est un exercice de dingos avec des pompes où on lâche une main vers le ciel en croisant les pieds (au péril de sa vie). En voyant la démo, je me dis: 'je vais jamais y arriver'...

0:53 ... et effectivement, ça le fait pas trop. Je craque comme une grosse bouse, jurant qu'on ne m'y reprendrait plus. Le logiciel, sommet de l'ironie, me qualifie de 'grand sportif' alors que, haletant comme un pur-sang venant de remporter le Grand Prix d'Amérique, je m'affale pitoyablement dans mon divan. Le sport, ça tue!

0:58 Pour terminer cette heure de sport intensif, du saut à skis. La descente se fait en pliant les genoux. Si on se penche vers l'avant, on accélère. En bout de tremplin, il faut apparemment se relever brusquement pour sauter. Mais c'est pas évident, et je me vautre tristement.

1:01 Je parviens enfin à réussir un saut! En l'air, il faut garder son équilibre et se pencher pour aller loin. Je fais un petit 85 m. Mais cette épreuve est assez géniale!

Vais-je continuer à y jouer?
Oui.

Pourquoi? Pour perdre du poids! J'ai envie de pousser l'expérience au bout des 3 mois, et voir si ce jeu reste motivant sur le long terme. D'ailleurs, sur ce blog, dans le petit encadré 'Wii Fat' en bas à droite, je vous tiendrai informé de l'évolution au fil des semaines. Je ne suis pas narcissique au point d'imaginer que cela puisse vous intéresser, mais cela me motivera (peut-être...) à continuer.

Et si certains mini-jeux sont assez médiocres, d'autres (ski, saut à skis) sont vraiment très réussis (et il m'en reste plus de 30 à découvrir)! Nintendo parvient une fois encore à révolutionner la manière de jouer, et je suis sûr que tout le monde qui passera à la maison adorera dévaler les pistes de ski.

D'autres jeux qui utilisent la Balance Board sont prévus, et notamment We Ski en juin. Rien que le titre est magnifique...



(*) C'est pas une blague, hein, l'ivrogne terminal filmé ci-dessus est bien la personne responsable du budget de la Région Wallonne, et contrairement à votre poivrot, l'ami Michel est plutôt coutumier de la chose. Mais bon, il paraît qu'il est très compétent avant l'apéro. Oh, et il est également ministre Wallon des Sports, ce qui, me semble-t'il, devrait lui imposer une certaine neutralité... mais c'est pas trop son truc, apparemment.

(**) Pour le retour du Quick'n'Toast dans les Quick belges!: le groupe Facebook, et la pétition. Vous aussi, vous pouvez changer la face du monde!

107 commentaires:

Anonyme a dit…

Excellent, comme d'habitude, ton petit compte-rendu. Et, comme tu le précise toi même, je serais très content de pouvoir essayer tout ça chez toi à l'occasion.
Par contre, pour le régime, j'attends de voir. Perso, il me semble que si tu faisais un peu plus de shopping (avec échauffement pour éviter tout claquage), la fonte des masses arriverait plus vite...

Anonyme a dit…

Je me suis toujours demander, étant du Nord de la France, si le sieur Dardaen était en fait compétant ou non, ou si c'était un vil démagogue ?

Sinon bon courage pour ton régime =)

Unknown a dit…

Excellent, je compte aussi me l'acheter celui-là. Et ton compte rendu me conforte dans cette idée :-)

Vivement que le petit widget Wii Fat sur ton blog soit mis à jour afin de voir si cela fonctionne dans le temps :)

Loni a dit…

Je l'avais commandé aussi, mais une soirée bien arrosée ne m'a pas laissé le temps d'aller le chercher chez la gardienne. M'en fous, je testerai ce soir ;)

Nounet a dit…

@dindin: si je peux pour une fois te déchirer au ski, ce sera avec grand plaisir.

@norti: la Belgique politique se divise assez équitablement entre, d'un côté les ivrognes corrompus, et de l'autre, les arrivistes dangereux. Les jours d'élections, je préfère donc laisser aux idéalistes et aux naïfs le soin de choisir pour moi. Quant à Daerden, il fait un peu peur, il donne une image assez pitoyable, mais il reste probablement l'un des plus sincères du lot.

@alain, marc: bon amusement, et je serais curieux d'avoir vos records au ski, saut à skis et snowboard... Un classement mondial manque un peu, dans le jeu.

Anonyme a dit…

"Sympa mais simplet"

Copyright Le Stalle. Comment qu'on a failli se battre suite à cette élan de diplomatie aussi inspiré qu'éthylique. Nounet était déjà sur la voie des chiottes. Didi et moi en train de se dire qu'on allait repartir avec trois dents en moins...

En plus, si ma mémoire ne me trahit pas, le gars était plus balèze que le Stalle. Le Stalle qui, lui aussi, aime le sport !!!

Nounet a dit…

Bon sang, t'étais là à un mac' de foot? J'y comprends plus rien.

Et bon, ce n'est pas faire un grand affront au Stalle que d'affirmer que des mecs moins balèzes que lui, j'en connais pas des masses dans la tranche 12-80 ans.

Didi a dit…

Le Stalle, c'était pas à un mac' de foot mais au concert de RATM et concernant wii fit tu me fais littéralement bouillir de jalousie, j'ai hésité et ne l'ai pas pris finalement (alors que mon corps est pire que le tiens).
Mais je m'en fou demain j'ai mon GTA IV...(que je revends quinze jours après pour wii fit...)

Icy a dit…

74.90€ chez carrefour tout à l'heure ... j'ai pas pu resister :p

Vivement wii fit 2 :
1ere partie: Un coach mii, choisi parmis sa collection(de pref qq'un qu'on apprécie guere). Divers costume possible: SS, chauffeur de taxi, Candy(du pay du meme nom), Bush... te traite de tout les noms, pendant que tu te creves a faire des pompes ... "meme pas cap de soulver ton grois cul de porc..."

2Ieme partie, un match de box, facon wii sport, avec le coach comme adversaire ...

Nounet a dit…

Djûûû, c'est pas cher!

Anonyme a dit…

bah, entre les deux belges qui se ridiculisent sur la télé française par leurs excès bibitifs et leur langage foireux, à savoir Arno et Michel Daerden, je préfère de loin le premier qui est une bête de scène et un vrai rockeur de talent !!! Quant aux compétences du Michel à mon avis elles doivent se limiter à la comptabilité, c'est là son vrai métier, et comme il a pour clientèle son parti c'est sur qu'il doit s'y connaitre pour les meilleures méthodes de cacher une fraude par-ci, des pots de vins par là et des pertes cachées par delà. Mais je médis, je vilipende.
Dis, Nounet, cela me revient à l'esprit comme ça: tu n'a pas la fibre sportive mais dans ton adolescence tu emmenais souvent tes petites amies à la piscine, je croyais à l'époque que c'était par amooouuuur du sport, mais je crois finalement que tu avais d'autres objectifs, vilain pervers !

et n'oubliez pas de me dire ce que vous pensez de mes albums si vous les achetez, Dindin j'attends ton venin et aussi d'autres anecdotes du genre la bite du basketeur noir scotchée sur sa cheville (heu, sur sa cuisse je veux dire), ça c'est fun ! (private joke rendue publique, osons !

Loni a dit…

Pour le saut à skis, j'ai fait 170 comme meilleur score, par contre je n'ai pas encore d'épreuve de snow, faut la débloquer ?

Sinon, j'ai failli y casser la gueule quand elle m'a dit que j'étais presque obèse (et ma femme s'en était gaussée), mais je me suis calmé quand cette dernière s'est pesée à son tour. C'est une saloperie, cette machine.

Nounet a dit…

@pp: c'est quoi cette histoire de gonzesses à la piscine? Même moi je ne m'en rappelle plus... Mais c'est sûr que si je me suis, ado, OCCASIONNELLEMENT rendu à la piscine, c'est pas pour le plaisir de faire des longueurs (j'ai beau réfléchir, je ne vois pas de sport plus rébarbatif que la natation).

Moi j'ai lu tes deux BD! Tout d'abord, je trouve cela fantastique que tu parviennes à mener à bien tes rêves. C'est dément, je suis admiratif!

(pour ma part, bien calé dans mon oisiveté assumée, je rêve simplement de pouvoir regarder tous les DVD que j'achète... Et même ça, j'y arrive pas!)

A part ça, qu'est-ce que j'en pense? D'abord, histoire de cadrer le débat, mes références en matière de BD sont diamétralement opposées à ce que tu fais (Vuillemin, Edika, Larcenet, Bill Watterson ou encore Scott Adams... Rien de 'sérieux'), et je dois avouer que Largo Winch, par exemple, m'est rigoureusement insupportable. Là, je sens que tu aimerais me frapper ;-)

Cela dit, j'ai nettement préféré le scénario de Think Tank, plus 'réaliste' que New-Messiah. La fin de NM m'a un peu surpris... Beaucoup de choses restent en suspens, sur One, sur la suite possible des événements. Je trouve la fin un peu... bizarre.

Think Tank est plus intéressant, on y 'croit' plus.
(peut-être un peu car dans NM, j'ai un peu de mal avec la réalité dépeinte mais avec de faux noms: Grégoire XVII, Gary Duke, Vustigzer... alors qu'à l'inverse, tu cites nommément Jean-Paul 2 ou la Fox News. C'est un détail mais ça fait un peu drôle)

Et enfin, tout est une question de goût personnel, mais j'ai un peu de mal avec les dessinateurs. (je n'ai pas honte à le dire car tu n'y es pour rien :-) )

Redondo, je trouve que le dessin manque souvent de détails et est un peu vide (et la scène du meurtre d'Oswald, cramé p.28, est quand même mal rendue, avec deux, trois flammèches sur le dos, on se dit qu'au pire il s'en sort avec des brûlures au 2° degré...)

Le dessin de Taborda est très bien pour les décors, mais il a un gros problème avec les gonzesses, je pense. Attention, j'ai rien contre une belle paire de temps en temps, mais bon, faut pas abuser, quoi, on a l'impression de voir 50x la même femme tout au long de la BD... (p.ex. page 14, case 5: c'est pas possible, elles sont clonées :-) )


Mais bon, je critique un peu, je pinaille, c'est juste pour te donner mon avis. Mais avant tout, les scénarios sont rythmés, originaux, documentés et agréables à lire. Et je me réjouis de mettre la main sur le Passeur, qui devrait être plus proche, si je ne m'abuse, de mes centres d'intérêt personnels.

Nounet a dit…

@marc: 170... en un ou deux sauts? Moi mon record c'est 170 en un,... et 332 en 2 sauts. Et oui, le snowboard est à débloquer.

Allez hop, 'bouboule', on y retourne ;-)

Loni a dit…

En un saut, t'inquiètes ;)
Mais comme j'avais foiré le premier, je dépasse de peu les 200.

Je vais continuer de m'entraîner !

Loni a dit…

Bon, ça y est, j'ai pété le hiscore en saut à skis : 355, je suis maintenant une superstar !

Sinon, j'ai essayé presque tous les autres, et suis étonné de voir que j'ai des muscles d'acier dans presque tous les exos de musculation ... Certains me font d'ailleurs douter de la précision, comme celui des abdos (Hum)...

Ha, et au fait : Bouboule toi-même !
Non mais.

Nounet a dit…

355, la classe! Je coince toujours à 332... pour l'instant!

Ouais, pour les abdos, la planche détecte juste que tes talons touchent au bon moment, c'est *un peu* naze. On peut très bien se contenter de s'asseoir sur une chaise et de flanquer 10 coups de talons à la planche au bon moment, et hop, 100%.

Loni a dit…

Par contre, j'ai été impressionné par la précision du capteur sur un exercice d'équilibre : debout sur un pied, une ligne te donne l'orientation de ton centre de gravité de manière très surprenante !

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